'Stop spending on validation...': Financial advisor urges focus on identity not image
In a thought-provoking post on X (formerly Twitter), CA Nitin Kaushik urged readers to rethink the way they define wealth and success. According to Kaushik, many of us spend our lives pursuing milestones and lifestyles designed not for personal fulfillment, but for social approval — and the cost, he says, is far higher than any EMI or rent payment.
“One day, you realize — the costliest thing you’ve ever paid for isn’t your EMIs, your rent, or your investments. It’s the life you built for validation,” Kaushik wrote in a detailed thread that quickly gained attention online.
He elaborated that while people often chase the “good job,” the “right apartment,” and other socially sanctioned achievements in their 20s, by the time they reach their 30s, they may have all the material assets but none of the alignment or peace of mind they truly crave.
“You own everything… except your peace,” Kaushik said, emphasizing that approval is “the most expensive subscription you’ll ever pay for.” Every success, every milestone, he explained, increases the cost — demanding more time, mental bandwidth, and emotional energy than most realize.
The Chartered Accountant drew a stark distinction between financial stability and emotional over-leverage. “It’s not that you managed money badly. You just didn’t realize that peace of mind has the highest ROI. The real turning point isn’t financial independence. It’s identity independence,” he wrote.
Kaushik advised a shift in focus: moving away from purchases and decisions that impress others toward investments that bring personal fulfillment. In doing so, he suggests, wealth transforms from a number on a bank statement to a state of mind. “You start cutting unnecessary expenses — not just from your wallet, but from your energy. You unsubscribe from comparison. You stop renewing guilt-based goals,” he said.
He concluded with a reflection on authenticity, calling it “the most expensive currency” that many trade for social validation. “But the day you stop buying validation, you finally afford your real life — the one that feels light, free, and finally yours,” Kaushik wrote.
