Brian and Arthur: 'We might bicker but we're a good team'
On a dreary winter's day, the Dowling-Gourounlian family is a ray of sunshine. Janice Butler meets Brian, Arthur, Blake (3) and Blu (1) for a love-filled cover shoot and talks to the pair about parenthood, ambitions, and possible growing their family.
On another wet, dreary day, with the country drenched in rain for weeks, the warmth of the Palmerston House Estate was a welcome escape for our cover shoot with Brian, Arthur and their two gorgeous girls Blake (3) and Blu (18 months).
The warmth came not only from the comfortably grand location but from the infectious fun the family of four brought to the day. Arriving bang on time for a 9am start, Brian and Arthur unload the girls from the car and quickly get set up in the bedrooms allocated to hair and make-up; this is not their first rodeo. The girls, especially Blake, who has graced her own fair share of magazine covers already, are completely relaxed with the pace of a cover shoot.
With the styling team in place, Blake charms everyone with her chats, her baked goods that she had made the day before and the ease with which she tried on clothes and got her hair put up into 'space buns’. Her younger sister Blu, who will turn two in the summer, was slightly less interested in the glamour, opting for the comfort of a nap in the arms of her Auntie Aoife (Brian’s sister) who was on hand to help with the girls on the day.
I talk to Brian and Arthur as they’re getting ready, "team work, team work," chants Arthur as he tries a few outfits, making decisions quickly and efficiently with the stylist Irene.As with all modern families, juggling work and family life, the Dowling-Gourounlian clan is busy but they seem to relish it and going from a family of three to four was an easy transition says Arthur. "It’s definitely easier the second time around. You know what you’re doing and you’re adapting to the busier lifestyle," he says. "The girls are great friends. Don’t get me wrong, they kill each other too, but that’s normal, it’s how it goes," he laughs.The family are renting a home in south Dublin, having moved there two years ago from Straffan to be closer to work. But like a lot of people, they’re now trying to get onto the property ladder and a move back to Kildare, where most of Brian’s family lives, might be on the cards.
"Your perspective changes when the second kid comes along" says Arthur. "You need that support network from family", he adds. "I’ve bought and sold properties in the past but never in Ireland and the prices are just insane. We’re looking at Kildare because there’s just a bit more value there in terms of what you’re getting for the money," says Brian.Brian and Arthur’s journey to where they are today has been filled with ups and downs. They first met in London in 2002: Arthur was a young dancer from Armenia and Brian was flying high after winning Big Brother. The couple dated for four years, broke up for five, reunited in 2011 before tying the knot in 2015. Arthur was always keen to have a family: "I thought I’d have three boys," he laughs. Brian wasn’t as certain. However, after his mother died in 2018 at age 61, he realised life was too short to be waiting for "the perfect time to have kid."
Originally, they were going to adopt and had started the process in L.A. but the pandemic brought them back to Ireland and that’s when their surrogacy journey began, with Brian’s sister Aoife generously offering to act as their surrogate.
Blake was born in 2022, followed by Blu in 20024. They chronicled their journey to parenthood in the TV documentary, A Very Modern Family, as well as the best-selling book of the same name. Last year, they renewed their wedding vows to celebrate their 10th anniversary, returning to the Powerscourt Estate in Wicklow. It was a way for them to reflect on so much that had happened in that decade, surrounded by their nearest and dearest."I pitched it to Arthur that we’d renew the vows and use it as an opportunity to celebrate his 40th birthday, which we didn’t get to do at the time with Covid. It ended up being a three-day event and there was no mention of his birthday," laughs Brian."But it was so nice to celebrate ten years of being married; ten years of anything is a major milestone. It was celebrating ten years together but also how far we’ve come as individuals. It was sad that my mother wasn’t there, after she had walked me down the aisle on our wedding day. But to have our kids there was very special. We’re all so busy and constantly on the hustle, so it’s nice to stop for a moment and enjoy the time with family and friends," he adds.Arthur who fled Armenia as a refugee in the early 1990s when the country was at war with its neighbour Azerbaijan. He has an incredible zest for life and a positivity we could all do with. He travelled so much in his younger years and experienced such upheaval that he says he found it hard to feel fully at home anywhere, until now with his family in Ireland.
Judges Brian Redmond,Karen Byrne,Oti Mabuse, and Arthur Gourounlian during the live show of RTE's Dancing With The Stars. Photo:Kyran O’Brien
"I can 100% say that Ireland is my home now. Before that I never really had a home since we left Armenia. I was always travelling around the world. I’ve had 37 homes, that I remember. This is the first time I’ve been in the one place for a considerable length of time. Now I have two kids, Ireland is definitely home."Professionally, they’re both as busy as ever: Arthur, a judge on Dancing with the Stars, is on our screens every Sunday. Last year, he had a best-selling children’s book Little Arty and the Happy Dance and launched a fragrance and clothing line. He’s got a new podcast with good friend Donal Skehan too. He’s recently signed with a UK agent to explore opportunities there. He’s seizing every opportunity that comes his way.
"There’s so much more I feel I can do: I’d love to do more TV shows, radio, I’m up for anything," he says with a smile. "I’ve got so many opportunities in Ireland that I never thought would happen. I love what I do, I just want to entertain people. But I always panic that it’s all going to stop one day, so I have to keep going with new things."But if it all goes, I’ll work in a coffee shop. With all that’s happening in the world, you need to have a bit of perspective. I’ve gone through the worst, I heard the bombs exploding, I experienced that and this is why I don’t take myself seriously. I’m still alive and here enjoying life," he adds.Brian is of course also on our TV screens with The Six O’Clock Show every weekday evening, co-hosting with Katja Mia. He has a documentary coming out in the late spring called Toxic Threads, a deeply personal investigation into the scourge of online hate. Brian and Arthur have been the focus of online hate, especially when they were quite open about going on their surrogacy journey. He wants to expose this toxic world.
"Arthur and I have been dragged through the wringer with online trolls and the stuff that’s been said. You have to stand up to these bullies. This isn’t going to be a ‘poor old me, I get trolled’ documentary, it’s about what is trolling, why do people feel like they can do it and what are the consequences of it," he explains.Last year, Brian hung up his 98FM microphone after more than two years hosting the weekday morning show with Suzanne Kane. The rumour mill was set alight when, just minutes apart, they separately announced they were departing the station. It came after Suzanne was missing in action from her hosting gig for months. Was it all a storm in a teacup?"I made the decision in February of last year not to go back to radio. I had a face-to-face meeting with everyone involved in that show and told them. I had loads of reasons why I didn’t want to do it any more, and I explained those. After that, I have no control over how people want to react to situations," he answers.
"After I finished up, I was asked if I wanted to fill in on Today FM with Jennifer Zamparelli, so I was given other opportunities within the Bauer radio family. There’s no issues there. I was very surprised by the amount of interest there was in that, but what was difficult was reading stuff that was no way near the truth, none of it made sense. I’ll be doing this job for 25 years this year and I don’t think you ever get used to the sh*tty side of it. People will always have an agenda, so you just have to do your job professionally and get home to your family," he concludes.
The couple say they might expand the clan further as they still have some frozen embryos. "We had always said we’d love three children," says Arthur. "I always wanted one," laughs Brian."We have said we’d try for one more. We’re not sure how or when but it would be great, but if it doesn’t happen, we’ve been blessed with two gorgeous girls," adds Arthur."What started the conversation is we still have some frozen embryos and the time allowance on those needs to be extended so that’s what has us thinking. When you know you have them, it’s very hard to let go; they’re not just embryos to us, they’re our possible children", adds Brian.Arthur says, "We might bicker but we’re a good team," I ask them what’s the key to a long-lasting relationship? "Trust, no jealousy, and communication", answers Arthur."I think the hardest time for us – and it’s probably the case in a lot of relationships – was when we were trying to have a family. There was a lot of pressure on us and you’re having to have those conversations of what does life look like if we can’t have children. Are we enough for each other?" says Brian."But Arthur and I are really good at relying on each other in those moments," says a happy Brian.
