22,250 people checked whether relationship was abusive, says Women's Aid
More than 22,000 people checked whether their relationship was abusive last year, new figures from Women’s Aid reveal, as the organisation launched its Valentine’s Day 'Too Into You' national public awareness campaign. Too Into You is aimed at helping young people recognise the difference between healthy relationships and intimate partner abuse, and to understand that abuse is not love.One in five young women in Ireland experiences abuse from a current or former male partner by the age of 25.Women’s Aid found growing evidence that young people are questioning behaviours in their relationships that are often normalised as “romantic”. Some 22,250 people took the Too Into You relationship quiz on toointoyou.ie in 2025 to check whether their relationship was healthy. Too Into You is part of Women’s Aid’s domestic abuse prevention work, designed specifically for people aged 18-25, with a particular focus on young women, who are disproportionately impacted by intimate relationship abuse.Abuse in young relationships is still frequently dismissed as drama or jealousy, misconceptions that often mask the seriousness of what many young women are experiencing, Women’s Aid warned. Controlling behaviours are often misinterpreted as signs of passion or care, allowing coercive control to take root long before it is recognised as abuse. “Too Into You is more than a campaign, it’s about changing the way young people understand love,” said Mary Hayes, project co-ordinator of Too Into You.
Abuse in young relationships is often minimised or framed as jealousy, passion, or care. But behaviours that create fear, shame, or control are not romantic, they are red flags of abuse. This campaign is about helping young people trust their instincts and empowering them to understand that abuse is not love.
“This is a deeply gendered issue. Young women are navigating dating and relationships in a culture that often normalises controlling behaviours. "The abuse they face can have devastating impacts on their health and wellbeing, their freedoms and choices. Too Into You is part of Women’s Aid’s domestic abuse prevention work, designed specifically for people aged 18-25, with a particular focus on young women, who are disproportionately impacted by intimate relationship abuse. Picture: Paul Sharp"Too Into You exists to say clearly: Love should feel safe, respectful and empowering, not frightening or restrictive,” Ms Hayes said.One young woman, Sophie (not her real name) said she was subjected to abuse by her ex-boyfriend at the age of 20.“I believed he cared, that he loved me, he made me believe those things," she said. "I didn’t realise it was abuse at first, I thought it was just part of being in a relationship. He said he wanted to know my location out of concern, that he didn’t want me wearing certain things because it would attract attention he couldn’t protect me from.“I didn’t know what he was capable of, this person, who claimed to love me yet made me feel so broken and afraid. "He would send me pictures of trees and tell me he was going to hang himself from there, and leave a note blaming me for everything if I left him. Then he would ignore me, as punishment. "I really think if I stayed with him I wouldn’t be here today.“Sometimes it can be hard to see the red flags when someone has twisted your mind."
