Whatever These Drunk Podcasters Think, No, Tesla Autopilot Isn't Your Designated Driver
In the podcast, after an incredibly tasteful joke about AIDS, Bridges brings up the topic of Autopilot in response to another round of drinks being served to the hosts:
Bridges: You wanna know what the best game-changer of 2025 is for me?
Kreischer: What's that?
Bridges: I bought a Tesla. It has Autopilot.
Kreischer: Does it work like — like that?
Bridges: Lemme tell you something.
Kreischer: Where you're like, [slurred] "Tesla get me home?"
Bridges: Yeah. That's the problem. That's — that's literally the problem. I'll go after it, and I'll be like — I'll press the Home button, as long as you look forward, you're home.
Someone named "Daddy Steve," who is also here, to Kreischer: Have you, do you — do you have a Tesla?
Kreischer, laughing: No, I don't, but I'm getting one!
"Daddy Steve": Really? Interesting. Oh no no, you 100% have to get the autodrive Tesla, the new one!
Bridges: It's — like, it's probably very unfortunate for you 'cause like, the mo— the best you can get is like a Model X, which, you — I don't know what your daily driver is, but you're rich so you could probably be like "Ah, it's gonna like, be a downgrade from my G-Wagen or some sh–." But, you get in that motherf—–, I'm telling you, you press the Home button, the wheel starts spinning, you're just — you're, you could jerk off in there, you could, you could literally—
Kreischer: For real?
Bridges: —you could watch.
Kreischer: How is — there's gotta be porn of someone having sex in the Tesla while it drives.
Bridges: Oh there's plenty.
No one should be drinking or having sex behind the wheel of a Tesla or any other vehicle with driver-assist software. This software has already been shown to make us less attentive drivers, and Bridges and Kreischer's comments show the natural end point of software that's advertised as being far more hands-off than it really is. You'd think Tesla's founder Elon Musk losing a $240 million lawsuit due to overblown self driving claims about Autopilot would give these mighty media minds pause, but no. Anyway, don't ever drink and drive, even in a Tesla.
